The Clever Badger I'm not dead yet!

The Badger’s Guide to Internet Fauna, Volume 2

Today we'll look at some more of the exciting denizens of the internet.  Classification of internet fauna can be tricky, because different species often share characteristics that, at first glance, seem remarkably similar.  The key to successful classification rests in being able to determine which of these characteristics are derived characteristics and which are examples of convergent evolution.  Another way of considering the matter is that while assclowns may behave similarly, there are a lot of different ways to get to that point.  

If you have spent any time at all on internet discussion boards or on blogs with topics that are in any way controversial,you've probably seen discussion participants who tend to get argumentative, in the manner of the characters in Volume 1 of the Guide to Internet Fauna.  Typically, these gits will eventually get banned, but that's often not the end of them.   

Enter...  

The Sock Puppet - Representative Generic Specimen

The Sock Puppet - This pernicious pest uses a variety of techniques to create new identities from which he can continue his asshattery.  

These techniques can vary depending on whether you run a blog or a forum, and whether or not you require registrations.  There are several categories:  

The Premeditated Sock

The Premeditated Sock - This subspecies of Sock will register for your site, and then (possibly over a period of weeks or months) create several different identities.  The more advanced Premeditated Socks will use multiple IPs and e-mails to conceal their common owner.  These sleeper Socks may remain dormant for years, or they may be active throughout their lifetime, chiming in on discussions from time to time.  It can be extremely challenging to positively identify such users as Socks.  Often it takes comparisons of writing styles or trends within discussions to ferret them out.  An infestation of such Socks can be a nightmare for the administrator of a large blog or forum, since they able to hide effectively amongst the normal users.  One helpful clue is that if you ban someone who has been a heavy participant in discussions, and a user who has rarely or never posted turns up loudly defending the banned individual, you might be dealing with a sock. 

The Impulsive Sock. Note the slovenly appearance

The Impulsive Sock - This variety of Sock is usually easier to detect.  Typically, a participant gets banned, and within a day or so a new user appears that interacts much like the banned identity.  Often, an administrator can figure out what's going on just by comparing IPs or the registrant's e-mail address.  While stamping out Impulsive Socks isn't typically as challenging as dealing with the Premeditated sort, it can be no less frustrating.  Often what the Impulsive Sock lacks in sophistication he more than makes up for in tenacity.  

The Multiple Personality Sock

The Multiple Personality Sock - Occasionally you'll notice several commenters that always seem to interact with each other, sometimes in rapid-fire succession.  They may all agree, or there may be one hold-out that the others gang up on, but you can pretty much count on the fact that if one comments, they all will.  This may be a case of the Multiple Personality Sock.  A recent example of this (which actually inspired me to write this)  is illustrated here.  If you observe what you think might be a Multiple Personality Sock, you can have a little fun by trying to provoke the various faces of the Sock into arguing with each other.  

The Agent Provocateur Sock

The Agent Provocateur Sock - The last sort of Sock to mention here is the Agent Provocateur.  These are rare, but dangerous, and tend to emerge during times of strife.  Despite their innocent appearance, their sole purpose is to foment discord.  Typically, they'll initiate their troublemaking with a private message or an email, maybe something like "I just wanted to tell you that  you're doing a really good job of moderating the Godzilla Back Scales forum.  The other mods are real hard-asses, especially Fire_Breathing_Mama."   Your alerts should start triggering at this point, because: 

 

It's very, very likely that you're dealing with an Agent Provocateur Sock.  It may be someone who, in fact, doesn't like Fire_Breathing_Mama and is trying to dig dirt on her, or it might be Fire_Breathing_Mama herself trying to figure out who her friends on staff are.  Or it could just be someone trying to stir up trouble.  Don't take the bait.  It's much better not to let yourself get dragged into the middle of internet drama. 

And with that, we complete our brief survey of Sock Puppets.  For our next installment, we'll be looking at the vast and varied world of Trolls. 

-Jay 

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